Book Review of Dwarves in Space
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About the Book
Title: Dwarves
in Space
Author: Sabrina
Zbasnik
Genre:
Science-Fiction / Fantasy
Thousands of years after the jewelry's
destroyed, the sword reforged, the dragon ridden, and the indecipherable
prophecy translated into a recipe for sugared biscuits, the dwarves turned to
that final frontier: space. And along came the elves, orcs, gnomes, trolls,
ogres, and those vermin-like upstarts, humans.
Dwarves in Space is Tolkien merged with
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy in a horrific transporter accident.
The Elation-Cru is not the flashiest ship, nor
the newest, or even has all of its bolts attached; but she can fly. Well, sort
of wade through space, and that's when all the parts are working. She supports
a sugar addicted dwarven pilot, an elven engineer, an orcish doctor, a silent
djinn, and the lone human trying to hold the entire thing together with duct
tape. Variel, the captain, has been hiding from a secret for the past five
years and time's finally run out.
When she goes against her common sense and fights
to save her onboard assassin/renter from a job gone sour, she finds herself
before an ex-colleague that knew her in her previous life as the Knight of the
realm. The entire ship is sent on a mad dash across the universe -- from a
decaying space station, home to the wackiest species the galaxy has to offer,
down to the Orc homeworld, which wouldn't be so bad if Variel hadn't spent most
of her previous life fighting in the war against them. Chances of survival are
nil and slipping fast.
Author Bio
S. E.
Zbasnik has a degree in genetics, which means there may or may not be a horde
of monkeoctopi doing her bidding to take over the world. Bringing that
scientific approach to the fantasy world is her game, trying to put some common
sense into magic and magic into common sense.
She
currently lives with her husband and beloved dog, who dress up like Sherlock
Holmes and solve mysteries in their spare time. She spends nearly of all her
time in Nebraska but that's because it is impossible to leave without finding the
lamppost. She lives in a house that has at least four walls and there are some
other souls wandering forlornly calling to their lost lives within.
She
loves and hates writing as she both loves and hates herself.
She's
a huge video game nerd especially for Dragon Age, Mass Effect, and Bioshock as
well as Doctor Who and makes fan art in her down time.
She's
a neutral good assassin, so it's best to not get on her bad side.
Links
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Book Excerpts
“Bys is
the name, good person, and maps are my game,” the gnome was a littler larger
than a fat house cat, its shoeless ankles kicking into the small stand he
perched upon housing a scannable map. Variel passed her hand over it, but the
PALM only blinked and shuddered, as if it wanted nothing to do with this place.
“No good, eh?” Bys rose to its feet and
glanced up to her eyes, “Things ne’er updated anyway. What you want, my dear tallwalker, is
directions.”
“Is that so…” Variel slipped into her
noncommittal ‘I’m just browsing’ voice, “And you just happen to know where I could acquire some I
take it.”
Bys slapped his suspenders in place — rather
impressive as he forgot to put pants on — and grinned, the gnawing teeth of the
gnomes displayed proudly. “Why yes, I believe I can direct you myself!” And
then he giggled.
“I see,” she stepped back, knowing when she
was part of the game. Every race had their angle, their almost subconscious
drive that some scientists claimed was encoded in every strand of DNA. Most
never translated it, letting the urge to exchange children for gold, building a
house on top of chicken legs, or gnawing upon billy goats languish within the
rest of their junk code along with vestigial tails and digesting milk. But
there were always a few, usually ready to play it up for tourists, who got
their jollies out of dressing the devolved barbarian when they could.
“Where are you going, young one?” Bys asked,
as if Variel didn’t easily have a good twenty years on him. “I assure you,” his high
voice began to reach into dog toy levels of squeaking as he grew agitated, “I
am the only one on this station who can guide you.”
“Uh-huh,” Variel turned to a Bugbear manning a
small chips stand and asked, “Could you point me to the ‘Clear Veins’ clinic?”
The Bugbear put down its tongs and glanced at
her. The grease of the fry oil drenched its black coat until the goblin bear
shone like onyx. “It is down the next aisle, to the right,” it mashed out
through an elongated mouth, before it pulled out a lollypop and better
enunciated, “Beside the shop that specializes in livers.”
For a moment Variel wanted to joke about
whether they were selling, buying, or frying, but thought better of it. On
Vargal the answer could be yes to all three. Instead, she nodded her head and
thanked the Bugbear. It returned to its greasy life and Bys shook its tiny fist
at the goblin that stole away its fun.
Review:
I am a huge fan of Doctor Who and “Hitchhikers
Guide to the Galaxy,” both of which remind me of this story. It also sounds a little like the start of a
joke: ‘A human, orc, elf, dwarf, and
genie were on a space ship…” The story
manages to be both funny and tense, sometimes at the same time.
I give this book 5 out of 5 clouds.
This
product or book may have been distributed for review; this in no way affects my
opinions or reviews.
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